Category: Retired Life

Posted on

Rock Shows, Well, Rock

Can you guess from the title of this post what we did last night? If you said “I’ll guess you went to a kickass rock show last night.” You win! Congratulations! Of course there’s no prize or anything for your correct guess, except for the warm sense of self-satisfaction for reading a dead giveaway and not fumbling it away.

We (B2 and I) went up to Greensboro last night to see Shovels & Rope at The Pyrle, a newish venue right in the middle of downtown. This is the 2nd show we’ve seen there, Patterson Hood with John Moreland being the first, a couple three months ago, and this is rapidly becoming one of my favorite venues, for a variety of reasons. Not least of which is because it’s only about 30 minutes from home. That’s no small thing either, as every other venue we/I have been to here in NC (10 off the top of my head) is between 45 minutes and an hour and a half away. Since last night was “An Evening With” (there was no opener) and it started at 8:00 we were home at 10:15. The old man lurking in various body parts of mine has a deep appreciation for that. My only complaint with The Pyrle is that the acoustics feel a little off. Or the mixer board/person running the board. I’m far from an expert on things of this type, but I noticed at both shows the guitars were way louder than the vocals, and the vocals seem a little distorted compared to what I’m used to at other venues where I’ve seen shows. I feel like otherwise it’s been a pretty great experience to this point.

Another key factor in favor of this particular venue is the plethora of dining experiences from which to choose prior to the show. The first time we went, we made a reservation at a cajun/creole place right across the street. (That btw is the 3rd slash I’ve used so far, idk why, but after noticing it I feel like I need to make them a point of emphasis moving forward, let’s see how I do.) That was the first time either of us had eaten there and the food/service/ambiance were just outstanding. So naturally I looked to make another resy there for last night, but, alas, they’re closed on Sundays. Our Plan B for dinner proved excellent anyway, a taco joint a couple doors down from the venue, that we’ve been to several times in the past. I had a couple of Korean bbq tacos and B2 had a Nashville chicken taco and a version of the ones I had only with tuna replacing the bbq.

I feel like at this point I need to diverge from my previous course here for a brief detour to describe one of the (many) endearing quirks B2 has. Bearing in mind that I have outquirked her by a factor of roughly 37. Also I want to tread carefully here so as not to offend/infuriate/piss off/cause them to launch a counterattack any of my female readers/friends. Many persons of the female persuasion (and some males as well, I’m sure) carry a handbag or purse of some type or another because, well, sometimes people need things and sometimes they need those things right. effing. now. and I totally get that, I truly do. There have been multiple times where I have asked B2 “Hey, do you have ____.” and the answer invariably is “Yes” as she reaches into her purse and produces the requested item for me. Now, here’s where the quirk part comes in. She refers to her purse as a “pocketbook” and my frequent comment to her is “Who has pants big enough for the pocket that thing could fit in? It’s a valise, if not suitcase. If it wasn’t for the handle it could be a steamer trunk.” Again my quirks are numerous, but I will always chuckle at her description of the weight lifting apparatus she calls a “pocketbook”. I mean, seriously, you could anchor a small watercraft with it.

Back to last night, after we ate we walked a couple blocks back to where we parked so B2 could leave her “pocketbook” in the car, rather than having to take it through security and check it etc, etc, etc. and due to the close proximity of, well, everything, we were back to the venue with ample time to get to our seats. Which is, of course, very convenient. So I’ll end this portion of the post with, yes, lovely venue, we’ll see more shows there, I’m sure.

The show itself was just excellent. This was my 2nd time seeing Shovels & Rope, and B2 saw them last night for the 1st time. It was not for lack of trying to see them however. The first time saw them was, I think, in Chattanooga at a music festival in the before times. I got tickets to a music festival in Charleston, SC that they were hosting. Then a crazy little thing called COVID 19 happened and the fest was among the things that didn’t happen. There have been, I believe, two other occasions over the years when I’ve bought tickets to see S+R and had to miss it for whatever reason. So I was very hesitant to buy the tickets for last night. Like I wavered with this decision for a week or so before I finally thought it was worth the risk. And holy crap was it ever worth it. For the unfamiliar, S+R are a husband and wife team, Carrie Ann Hearst and Michael Trent, they’ve been touring for 15 years, and they make more music out of the two of them than some bands do with 5 or more pieces. For example, this song, which they played last night, and, btw, is brilliant also and aptly demonstrates their multi-instrumentality. Watching Carrie Ann sing, while she’s playing the drums and the keyboard simultaneously and omfg, mind officially blown. While you’re watching that video (you really should) pay attention to the lyrics and it’s clear that in addition to their musical skills, they love their dog. “Runnin’ like a color-blind, love-sick fool, runnin’ like I’ll die if I don’t get to you, runnin’ like I got more legs than two…” I mean, come on. If you’ve ever had a dog in your life you can relate to those lyrics amirite?

I think I’m gonna tap out here, I have a couple errands to run and I need to get moving. So I leave you with my musical choice which, today, is unironically Shovels & Rope at a reasonable (note I didn’t say moderate) volume. I’m not gonna lie, I think the cherry on top of this sundae would’ve been to listen to Guns N’ Roses (see what I did there?) but having never been a fan, I thought why start now. Besides, how far can you push a bit?

Peace

Posted on

Hello In There

What do you write when you don’t know what to write? No, really, I’m looking for a little help here. I guess the nature of this interaction kinda precludes getting your help today. So I’m gonna try something I’ve never done here before. While scrolling through the backstage portion of the website I noticed I’ve got 5 drafts of posts that withered on the vine. For, I think, a variety of reasons. One, for example, has a final line of “I’ve just hit a wall here…….” so I guess that one’s pretty self explanatory. But idk why I dropped this one where I did. Maybe a similar reason? At any rate, I decided I’m going to take a previously unfinished draft and, well, finish it. So, without further ado, I take you back to April of 2020 and let’s try and put a bow in this one.

Usually when I pick a title such as the one here, I apologize to the original author. Not today. Last week the world lost an incredible artist. John Prine died from complications of COVID-19.

Obviously, this is not breaking news. And, in the grand scheme of things, maybe it’s nothing more than a blip on our collective radar. I mean after all, world-wide the death toll has passed 100,000 and of that number many famous (and, I’m sure, infamous) people have died. So why did this one seem to strike the chord it did? All I know is, I’m not smart enough to know.

What I do know is this. As I’ve read the various articles written about him this past week, it was obvious how influential he was on modern music. I read one piece that described him as the “Godfather of Americana” music and I think that’s perfectly appropriate. He was an amazing songwriter and, until his passing, I never really thought about that particular skillset of his. Shame on me. I first became aware of John Prine around 1976 or 1977. I worked in a restaurant at the time, and two of the other cooks, Ray and Skip, would sing Prine songs. Specifically “Illegal Smile“ (Ray) and “Please Don’t Bury Me“ (Skip) as we worked. I was also listening to XRT by this time, so I became familiar with other John Prine songs from his first couple albums. Here’s the part I never really considered until now though. He was 24 years old when he wrote songs like “Hello In There” and “Sam Stone” and “Paradise” and if you’re not familiar with any of them hit those links. Even if you do know the songs, they’re always worth a listen. And, as always, If I knew how to link to YT without the #*%#@% ads, I would. So apologies in advance for that. One of the other things that always blows my mind about John Prine is this- he was “discovered” by Roger Ebert, the Pulitzer Prize winning movie critic from the Chicago Sun-Times, at a small club in Lincoln Park. At the time Ebert saw him, John was still a letter carrier for the USPS in suburban Chicago, Westchester, I think.

John Prine is high on the list of artists I wish I’d seen when I had the chance. Although oddly enough, B2 and I did see his son Tommy, at his, iirc first solo show, over by Chapel Hill a couple three years ago. I’m pretty sure we’ve seen him twice now and actually, as I type this out, I’m pretty sure I mentioned seeing Tommy Prine in a post shortly after the fact. Hah! Sometimes I scare myself, lol. Here is the aforementioned post and the bonus is, since it’s from the 2nd time we saw him, I can relate my little tale about the first time.

I have no recollection how I learned of the original show, probably an email from the venue, but that’s just a guess. The opener was a name that, when I read it, I thought was familiar, but couldn’t place it, so that drifted off into the ether. The night of the show came and we found ourselves (we were easy to find, we know what we look like) at a small venue (The Back Room) which is part of a larger venue (Cat’s Cradle) that is legendary in the Chapel Hill, Durham, Raleigh area. As we walked in, I saw one of the flyers for the show listing Peter Holsapple as the opening act and, once agin, the name felt familiar, but I still couldn’t place it. The show started and Peter came up on stage and started playing a song that also sounded familiar. When he got to the chorus I recognized it as a song by the DB’s and the lightbulb finally lit. Peter Holsapple was half of the songwriting team (along with Chris Stamey) of that very band.

Here we are, now six years ish after the fact so obviously I couldn’t tell you much of what either of them played, but I can tell you we had a wonderful time along with the 40 or 50 other people that came out to the show. What I do remember is that Tommy played mostly original music, although he did play one or two of his Dad’s. Maybe Paradise, maybe Angel from Montgomery, I’m not sure but he did a fine job either way.

Ok, Imma wrap this up now. I feel like I accomplished at least a little something by A.) getting an old draft wrapped up and B.) getting words on a page again, so I’ll take it as a win. Oddly enough, even though the post centers on John Prine and his son Tommy, I’ve been listening instead to one of my playlists , titled Speeding Ticket, as I try and hammer away at the keyboard. Don’t ask, I can’t explain the way my brain works (or doesn’t) but I’ve thoroughly enjoyed my musical choice du jour.

Peace

Posted on

Let’s Try This Again

You know, stuff happens. I started hitting this happy place a couple months ago with every intention of regularly posting something that amuses, well, me certainly, but hopefully a few of you as well.

You see where that got us.

So let’s climb back up on this beyotch and see what sort of masterpiece I have in my fingertips today.

Even though I’ve been away from this for a little bit now, I’ve still made notes to myself about potential topics. Glancing at them just now I’m choosing to call an audible since I was apparently kind of angry almost every single time I made a note to myself. Rather than piss and moan about something over which I probably have no control, let’s choose instead to stay lighthearted and frivolous, shall we? I mean, I’m ok with rage-typing when the mood strikes, but that can cut both ways, you know? Sometimes venting my spleen brings a little relief, but sometimes it leaves me with spleen remnants all over the place and that’s a mess to clean up.

I’m actually going to break from my typical format here, at least briefly, because it offers a nice segue to the next thing I want to fit in. I usually include at the end a tidbit or two regarding what I’m listening to as I type. Imma jump right into that today. I’m listening to Grace by the late, great Jeff Buckley and holy christ it’s amazing. His talent; as a songwriter, singer, and musician, was just staggering. We just watched a documentary, It’s Never Over, Jeff Buckley, about him yesterday morning and it was really well done. It came out earlier this year and is available to stream on a couple different outlets. You should check it out. And also, definitely add Grace to your library if it’s not already there. Some of his songs, whether original material or covers, will send a chill down your spine. “I Want Someone Badly” “Lover, You Should’ve Come Over” “Last Goodbye” “Grace” and of course Leonard Cohen’s “Hallelujah” all pop off the top of my head as favorites of mine. He also does a killer cover of “Kick Out The Jams” the old MC5 pearl. Yeah, you should listen to this album.

Now, I wrote that to get to this. It’s been on my list of potential ideas to trigger my writing for *checks notes* a little over 4 years. Now, to be faiiiiir, a lot of that delay was due to my distinct lack of being at this place, but today is your lucky day.

In September of 2021 B2 and I took a trip to Maine. It was fantastic btw. Amazing seafood, nice people, beautiful weather, pretty much everything you would look for in a trip of this type. Quick side note, holy crap people up there drove fast. I remember traveling on I95 between Portland and Augusta doing 80 mph and having the doors blown off by basically every other driver. This was not a phenomenon with which I am familiar btw. But enopugh of my driving habits, back to where I was headed with this…

We spent a couple, three days in Bar Harbor (Bah Hahbah for you phoneticists) and really enjoyed it. A large part of any travel we’ve done to this point, and almost certainly any travel going forward, is eating. The food scene in Maine generally, and in Bah Hahbah particularly did not disappoint. But the thing I wanted to get to isn’t food related, more like food adjacent, in that it happened while we were eating. We went to an Irish pub up there, the name escapes me because like I said, 4 years ago, but the “entertainment” was 3 old guys (apparently) inspired by Chicago as teens, now strolling downtown unleashed and playing barely recognizable versions of songs from the 60’s and 70’s. As they launched into what can be only be described through extreme generosity on my part, as a cover of the Stevie Wonder’s rollicking “Sir Duke” a woman sitting a couple tables away gleefully said “Oh, I love this song!” At which point I thought to myself “If that were true, you, madam, should be pissed off. Because what these alleged minstrels are doing to that song should be a crime against your ears as well as your musical sensibilities.”

That felt like a long way to go with not as much payoff as I’d expected, but I at least feel better for having cleared it off my ICRTD list, so I’ve got that going for me, which is nice.

I’d like to try and work this next part a little more fully in the next week or two, but for now I’m going to wrap this gem up by mentioning the OO and her SO came out for a visit week before last. We had a lovely time with them and I’m pretty sure they enjoyed their time in central North Carolina too. I (we) always appreciate when someone comes out for a visit. It’s a lot more involved than it may appear at first glance. So for someone to put in that kind of time, effort, and expense to visit with us? Yeah, there’s a lot of gratitude on our part. There were a few hijinks involved, nothing the authorities need worry about, but all involved parties need to grant clearances before anything comes out on the page here, you know?

I think I’m going to call it here today. I’ve got a couple odds and ends to take care of before I lose all interest in domestic duties, you know? For example, I’ve already lost interest in leaf removal for the day.

If only that were the last one, sigh. I’m fairly confident I’ll be dealing with them into next month. Such is life, amirite?

Peace

Posted on

In Which I Recount More Of My Tech Savviness*

Well, I think that title pretty much says it all doesn’t it? I mean, not everything or else there’d be no point in typing any further (settle down Ray) than the title. So allow me to fill in some more tech-related details. Shout out to a faithful reader (and also a family member) (it just occurred to me the Venn Diagram of readers and family members would probably have a steep overlap) (c’est la vie) for pointing out in the comments that I neglected to share the conclusion of my back door lock issue. What was I thinking?

Let me explain. No, there is too much. Let me sum up. (Sorry, it’s hard to pass up on the opportunity to drop in a Princess Bride reference.) When we left this topic, our intrepid writer (me) had a semi functional electronic back door lock. I was able to add in a few codes manually to lock and unlock the door, but wasn’t able to connect the lock to my home wifi network. This caused much consternation, and more bad language than I’d care to admit to using. Of course losing my shit also did nothing to expedite the problem, so I did my best to just let it be and wait for tech support to call me back. Patience, however, is rarely my strong suit so I was pleased that I was able to, more or less, not fiddle around with the lock on a daily basis.

The phone call from Schlage Tech Support came in a couple minutes after the scheduled time but still well within the expected window, and, as I expected, the issue was operator (me again) error. Nick, the tech, was remarkably patient with me, even when I made a full bodied effort to eff things up again by repeating the error I had been making all along. So thanks for that Nick! I think we were on the phone for a grand total of about 15 minutes and we had a fully functional back door lock once again! Yaaay technology!

Let’s see, what else do we have that’s tech-related that I can ramble on about for a few hundred words… Oh yeah, there’s this – Around the time I stopped actively doing this, although unrelated to it iirc, my laptop was starting to show signs of its age. I bought it, a MacBook Air, around 2014, and had been very happy with its performance from day 1. Over the last couple years I noticed it seemed a tad slow, not terribly, but enough that it was noticeable. Then it reached the point in its life cycle where Apple stopped issuing updates for it. A few apps stopped responding the way they had before, but I was usually able to figure out a workaround and keep getting results as I was accustomed to getting. I thought at the time about replacing it with a newer model, but decided against it because I also thought about how much less I was writing than I had been and was able to talk myself out of spending the money. And using it less and less frequently over the last couple years seemed to support my theory.

At least until a few weeks ago, when I had one of the aforementioned random ideas about a potential topic pop into my head. It was followed by a thought along the lines of “Geez maybe if I get a new laptop it’ll encourage me to put these thoughts down on “paper” and start posting again. The more I thought about it, the more I started to convince myself of the logic in that point of view.

Until, lo and behold, I found myself at the Apple Store. Where I met a lovely Apple person by the name of Oscar (or maybe Oskar, idk, I didn’t think to ask him how he spells it) who helped me narrow down which model I wanted/needed. Although I pretty much knew what I wanted going in, a little bigger, a little faster than what I was used to, but not top of the line. Anyway, here I am, typing away on my new MacBook Air, happy as a clam. Oscar, if you read this, you’re the best. And I owe you an apology, I should’ve asked where I could catch your act. As it turns out, Oscar is a stand up comic. That came up when he was asking me what I would use this baby to do. I told him about the blog and he asked for the address, then confirmed it after he pulled it up on his phone. And yes, I’d (we’d) love to come catch a gig so let me know. Or if I get back up to the store for something I’ll flag you down and ask.

I have to give kudos to Apple for the way they do stuff. Granted, I’m a long time user because I like the products, but I’ve never had a bad experience at one of their stores. And the Air purchase was just one example.

Here’s another one. B2 and I just got new phones. Not brand brand new, but last year’s model. Which actually brings me to a point I don’t like about Apple. They changed connectors from Lightning to USB-C. Now, that may seem a little like gobbledygook, but it refers to the end of the charging cable. I could go into greater detail about this, but I don’t really feel like it right now so… At any rate, due to that change, I needed a new cable. I had a cable at home to plug my phone into the car (I use Apple CarPlay while driving) however, it was a cheap version from some random device I had gotten at some unknown point in the last few years. So while it charged my phone in the car, it wouldn’t allow for the CarPlay hook up to occur. I chose yesterday, you know, 2 days after the release of the new version of the iPhone, as the day to go to the Apple Store to buy my cable. I noticed my lack of judgement when I pulled into the parking lot and had to park about 3 rows farther back than normal. And, as I walked up to the door the mass of humanity inside was hard to miss. Resolute in my decision to make my purchase, plus refusing to turn around and drive 30 minutes home stewing in the juices of my defeat, I joined the shopping fray. An employee asked me what I was looking to get and pointed me in the direction of the charging cords. It took me a couple minutes to find exactly what I needed (USB-A to USB-C) but, once I had one in my grubby little paws I saw a thing, kind of like a QR Code but different, on the shelf that said “scan to pay”. So I did. And I did. Scanned and then paid, I mean. And it was stupidly easy. Like I was convinced I did something wrong, easy. Like, how did they know I actually paid for it and how did they know I had the product I said I did? I kept the app open so I could show it to any employee that might question what the heck I was doing just walking out of the store like I owned the place with that charging cord in my hand. But no one even glanced my way. Mind boggled.

I think that just about brings us up to date on my tech (mis)adventures. I could probably rattle on a little about the phone shopping experience, but I think I’m good for today. I’m starting to get a little bleary eyed, I can’t imagine how you, gentle reader, are feeling.

Peace

PS- I spent a couple hours yesterday morning, thanks to the interwebz, listening to a Chicago treasure, Terri Hemmert, on Breakfast with the Beatles and as a result have had early Fab Four bouncing between my ears as this gets formed. I’ve thoroughly enjoyed it too. I’ve always been able to avoid singing along (off key and loudly) to whatever I listen to while writing, but one of these days I fear I’ll slip up. Of course it would be something else to write about so…

Again, Peace

*Savviness may or may not be an actual word. Consult your local thesaurus for clarity. Or lack of same.

PSS or maybe PPS I don’t remember- Since I’m nothing if not a public servant, I feel I need to warn you that when looking for an image to add to this post I GTS’d “techno boob” and I want to tell you friends, never GTS “techno boobs”. Yikes.

Posted on

Southernisms Episode III – A New Mope

Ok, for starters, and to get out in front of any Star Wars nerds that might be reading, I know I mixed metaphors in the title. But I couldn’t make anything witty out of Revenge of the Sith, whereas A New Hope seemed to fit my style. You don’t like it, write your own damn blog.

Now on to today’s literary potpourri. One of the things that B2 and I do throughout the spring and fall is go to baseball games. Specifically the games played by the 11 year old twin grandsons. They play on a local travel team (which as I write feels like an oxymoron, but it’s accurate. The team is local and they play travel ball). Moving right along. For the most part the games are within a 90 minute drive and usually within 45 so it’s not too demanding on us, no overnights, etc. They’re both good ballplayers and they really enjoy the game. That enthusiasm makes it so much easier to invest our time in their efforts. Geez that sounds harsh. We love the boys and we love baseball, how’s that? It’s a great way to spend time each week. All that to say I noticed something at the games this past weekend that got me thinking. If you’ve spent any amount of time here, or if you know me IRL, you probably just shuddered. It’s ok, you should be used to that by now.

Due to idk what, somebody on the team had to miss the weekend. Maybe it was an illness, maybe a prior family commitment, maybe the soon-to-be-mentioned kid happened to be available. All I know is the boys’ team had a “guest” player last weekend. If you’re unfamiliar with travel baseball, this is apparently kinda common, down here at least. Their team has had guest players before and I know of at least one occasion when the boys both guested on another team. At any rate, the guest player’s name was Ty. Nothing unusual about that, right? Many of you may know a Ty. Some of you may even be a Ty. It’s, well, I wouldn’t call it ubiquitous, but yeah, it’s a common name nowadays.

But this was what caught my ear and sent me spiraling down a bit of a rabbit hole. The name Ty, in the southern dialect, is pronounced Tah. Which, by logical conclusion leads me to believe that tie dye is, of course, pronounced TAH DAH (all caps to encourage your brain to read that with the appropriate sound of fanfare). Now, to be faaiir, I haven’t tested this hypothesis with my local (very local) native southern speaker, but I’m pretty confident I’m right on the money here.

Ok, here’s a brief editorial comment. Apparently I need to apologize for at least one and possibly two things here… A quick look at the top of this gem will show I chose Episode 3 for part of the title. I did that because in thinking I had written about Southernisms before I wanted to check back to confirm my thoughts. I quickly found a post titled Southernisms – The Sequel from a few years ago. Now, if you’re like me, seeing the word “sequel” in that title would lead you to assume that a prior edition of Southernisms existed. You, like me, would be wrong. Because I just spent 20 minutes looking for the original Southernisms post without success. So I’m sorry I don’t know how to count and you’re welcome for not having to fight the urge to look up the nonexistent original. Also I’ve already forgotten the other thing I may have wanted to apologize for, which leads me to my next entry on the topic of Southernisms. After all this confusion I’mma throw a duck fit.

Yes, you read that right. Duck fit. It’s a polite way to say lose your shit. Don’t bother asking, Idk the origin. It occurs to me I should really have B2 here next to me when I write about things like this, so I’ve got a quick reference handy. Although I’m not sure she knows the origin either. If I find out before I hit “Publish” I’ll let you know. Don’t hold your breath.

Lastly, at least until I compile some more (which will also probably be mis-titled)(just sayin) distinctly southern expressions, I’ll drop this one on you. What do you call the headwear, typically worn in the winter? You know the one; knit, usually snug fitting, possibly with a fluffy ball on top. Canadians call it a toque, but I’ve known it as a stocking cap, or a beanie. Here in this part of the country they are known as toboggans. I know, I know. I asked the same thing. They call them sleds. Even when they’re toboggans. Not the hat the sled. I hope you followed that one, I think lost myself. In summary- if you wear it on your head it’s a toboggan. If your butt sits on it as you slide down a snow covered slope, it’s a sled.

Lastly Lastly as I hammered away at this one I listened to some early Bob Dylan. I read a long form article on Dylan’s early days this morning on Mojo. I have to admit although I knew a lot of his early (ie early 60’s) work, I didn’t know a lot more of it. B2 and I went and saw A Complete Unknown in the theater last winter, shortly after it came out. I couldn’t tell you the last movie I saw in the theater, it had been quite some time prior to that. But we were both blown away by the film. It’s available now on Hulu if that’s an option for you. I highly recommend the movie. Unless you’re trying to write something at least theoretically humorous. If you don’t know Dylan’s songs from that era they were mostly either political or dark and sometimes both. Maybe I should go back to just listening to instrumentals while writing.

Peace

PS- because, well, you know… B2 wasn’t sure of the origin of “duck fit” she thought it might be a family thing. So of course I had to fire up the Google Machine because my curiosity got the best of me. And because I care about your education dear reader, here is the definition/origin of duck fit according to Wiktionary, which I’m sure is a highly reputable resource and clearly highly citable. You’re welcome.

Again,

Peace

Posted on

Back In The Saddle Again

Before I dive any further into any of this mess, Imma place this right here and, as always, apologies if you have to click through an ad. In addition to the title being apropos, there’s something about the exuberance of the song, at least once they get past the intro, that is (happily) a parallel with my mood towards getting back behind (in front of?) the keyboard.

There, I said it, I’m returning to ICRTDs. Truth be told I’ve never left, but I sure as heck haven’t produced anything in really long time. Some (Hi Ray) would say never, but that’s a story for somebody else’s blog. Idk if there’s any real reason I haven’t written anything for the last almost three(!) years. Other than I just didn’t. I still had ideas. I can’t tell you how many times something would happen and I’d think “geez I should write about that.” or random ideas would pop into my head at random times and instead of making a note to myself to flesh it out a little more, I’d let it wither on the proverbial vine.

It’s actually not accurate to say I haven’t written at all, I still kick out the biannual (biennial? idk and I don’t care enough right now to confirm) article for the Illinois Retired Fireperson (not its real name) magazine. Which is now an E-zine. I think. Idk if that’s a thing or not, but I’m on a roll right now so… Yeah, I’ve done two of those articles a year at 500 words a pop, which is actually harder than writing these gems. Typically I’ll toss out 1000+ words into one of these word salads, with minimal editing other than you know triple checking spelling and maybe a once over for a grammar faux pas along the way.

It’s not like I didn’t miss doing this either, I did. Just not enough to grab myself and haul my behind to a local (or local ish) coffeehouse with my trusty keyboard. Or to sit at the desk at home to create, well, anything. I don’t know that I can put a finger on what triggered this renewed interest in writing, but I’m not going to question the Muse. Let’s just go with it, shall we?

So, here’s a thing. I like to consider myself fairly tech savvy for an old timer. I mean, I know my limitations, but by and large, I can keep myself out of trouble when it comes to modern technology. Until recently. A couple, three months ago, I bought an electronic lock, a Schlage Encode, for the back door at La Casa Mains. The installation was a tad cumbersome, but I was able to do a workaround, and the lock worked flawlessly for us. Until late last month when the whole thing came to a screeching halt. What I thought was a prematurely dead battery turned out to be something else. The interwebz provided no real answer either so I reached out to Schlage, which in itself turned out to be ridiculously cumbersome as well. Poor #LillyNo heard so many bad words, none directed at her, of course, but she was not at all happy that I was so fired up. Of course Schlage’s customer service was closed on weekends, because apparently no one needs to lock their house other than Monday through Friday, so I scheduled a call back appointment for 5 days later. That was the first available slot. The morning of, I got an email to, very helpfully I might add, put the CS number into my phone so the call didn’t bounce to voicemail. The call came in, right on time, I answered, and heard nothing. Dead air. For about 10 seconds until the call dropped. As you may imagine, I was not pleased. Go ahead, imagine yourself silly, I’ll wait. The technician called back pretty quickly, the call was successful this time and she apologized for an error on her part. We started walking through the lock and got about two steps in when the problem surfaced. We tried a couple things to no avail, and she said she’d send out a replacement lock. I saw that as a win. When the replacement lock came out 4-5 days later I took that as another good sign. Then I tried to install the new lock.

Picture, if you will, Mount Vesuvius, or really any volcano, erupting and you’ll have a pretty fair idea of how the remainder of my replacement lock installation went. This time I was able to get as far as connecting to my home wifi network, which the lock has, to the moment I’m writing this, yet to find. Idk if it’s using both hands, but it can’t find it. That prompted another scheduling with Schlage CS, this time 8 days out. And yeah, that didn’t help my mood any either. I was able to enter some codes manually, so we can at least lock the door, but we’re nowhere near the full functionality of the lock, and they’re not cheap so I really feel like we deserve what we paid for the product. The next edition of “How do I make my new lock work” takes place tomorrow morning so send good thoughts and keep your fingers crossed for whatever sanity I have left.

But wait! There’s more!

We lost power the other night when a thunderstorm rolled through around 2:00 in the morning. It was restored before we got up so if it hadn’t been for the texts on my phone from the power company, and the clocks displaying the wrong time I would have never known. That evening I sat down to watch some tv, nothing in particular, I mean, right here, right now idk what I was going to watch. So nothing vital. But when I turned on the tv, the speakers wouldn’t connect. I said to myself “Self” I said “This isn’t right.” and it wasn’t. This is not a common occurrence in our house, and if it does happen, it’s usually about a 15 second long fix and we’re good to go. But on this particular night, not only did the typical fix not work, the tv sets, yes, all three of them, couldn’t find the speakers. Not. a. single. one. I was, shall we say, displeased. Because, if you recall (I know you can, I just wrote about it) my lock issues were running concurrently to this new tech problem. Poor #LillyNo was also not happy, as my language took an expected turn to the gutter. So as I’m running through the various potential fixes I could think of; restarting/resetting the speakers, restarting the wifi, restarting, well, anything that might remotely be connected to the issue, I noticed something. The speakers were connected to the wrong wifi network. Maybe it was related to losing power, idk, that seems logical, but it never happened before. Anyway, I had no clue how to get them back on the correct wifi network so I went back to the interwebz. And found all kinds of things that didn’t relate to my problem.

And then, I found an app for Apple Support.

Friends let me tell you that installing and working through this app was the single most pleasant customer service experience I’ve had in a really, really long time. I sent in my question and was redirected to iMessage where a text from Apple Support was waiting for me. It was a tad awkward at first, and tbh it was probably some type of bot or AI that I was interacting with, but after a very few minutes my problem was solved by unplugging the speakers, plugging them in to my computer and updating/restarting them. So I spent maybe 15 minutes on three of the four speakers, the other one, idk how, reconnected to the proper wifi network on its own, and I once again had tv’s and speakers that worked as I expected them to work.

As I prepare to close this Pulitzer-worthy nugget out, I really hope you’ll be able to read it. By that I mean, it’s been so long I’m not convinced I know how to successfully post anymore, I guess we’ll find out together. Also, I don’t have much (read none) of a social media presence anymore, so I’m not sure how to get this out to the masses and I use that term loosely. But I’m game if you are.

Lastly ish. Despite the reference way up top, I haven’t been listening to Aerosmith as I write this today. Nothing against the band at all, 16 year old me loved the album Toys In The Attic, but old me generally spends more time listening to other things. Today’s playlist has been one I created a few years ago titled I Have No Words and it’s all (hence the name) instrumentals. Jethro Tull, Rodrigo y Gabriela, Jeff Beck, some Irish reels and the like, Santana, The Allman Brothers, Roy Clark, Mason Williams, Link Wray, The Pogues, and many more. I remember reading somewhere that listening to words, whether songs or podcasts, or what have you, while trying to write was not helpful. So I thought I’d give this a shot. Honestly I have no idea if it worked or not, how do you quantify something like that, you know? At any rate, that’s all I’ve got for you today

As always, Peace.

Posted on

Why Modern Radio is A-OK

I suppose this is, to paraphrase the immortal Harry Doyle juuuust a bit behind. I wrote a couple months ago that I would be taping a segment to be played on a local radio station at a later date. Well, that date came and went. It aired on July 1st, something I didn’t find out until a couple weeks later, but regardless, it happened. I had thought it might be nice to put up a post with a link to the radio station in case anyone wanted to listen as it aired, sigh, and with that now an impossibility, I’m left with a couple options for those interested. As it turned out, B2 videoed my bit the night it was recorded, so I could put that up. Or, I could send you to the page on the website of the production company that recorded, edited, and got it radio-ready. As I type these words I haven’t decided which way I’ll go, so I guess we’ll find out together.

There are some differences between the two; despite my best efforts, my stories (well one of them anyway) weren’t “radio friendly” since it got lopped off completely. Kind of a shame too, that one got a great response from the crowd that night. But I guess I get it. Apparently you can’t say genitalia on the radio in the Bible Belt. Maybe anywhere else idk. I mean, I know George Carlin’s famous bit about the seven words you can’t say on the air (it’s a classic btw and if you’re unfamiliar I suggest you GTS) but genitalia wasn’t on his list so… Another difference is that, since the production company, you know, produces things, their version sounds a lot cleaner than the one B2 recorded. By that I mean it sounds like it was professionally recorded whereas our version sounds like it was recorded on somebody’s cellphone, which, oddly enough, is exactly how it was recorded.

So, you know, pros and cons for each. I suppose as far as that goes I could link to each of them and leave it up to you, gentle reader, to decide which one you prefer. Let me ponder all this for a bit as I meander across the keyboard.

The experience of doing the radio show was pretty excellent, I must say. But I already did kind of a recap of the evening, so I’ll just leave it at that and move along. Funny thing about that too. I was a couple hundred words farther along than I am here when I started to realize how familiar the things I was typing sounded. I scrolled through my last couple posts and there it was, this post covering the evening from the perspective of the next morning. *eyeroll* *facepalm* #reallygladicaughtthatbeforeitposted

Moving right along…

I’m not sure why I came to today’s musical selection but I’m listening to the Drive By Truckers this morning. In particular the Friday night show from 2019’s HeAthens Homecoming, a show which I happened to attend. They just came through our area recently, but we were unable to make the show. I can’t wait for them to come back around, they are firmly on the medal stand of my favorite bands, and just incredible live. Speaking of live music, I felt like I needed to name this with another radio-centric title and as I thought about which song to choose, this one popped into my head. It’s a long time fav of mine and I haven’t listened to it in a while. Apologies in advance if the ads get in the way.

I guess I’ve put off the inevitable long enough. Here’s the link to the video B2 shot and it’s age restricted due to subject matter, which is maybe why it got axed off the air, lol. This link will take you to the professionally recorded version that aired locally on July 1st. So check them out if/when you get the chance, and, as always, I appreciate any and all comments. Even those from you, Ray.

Peace

Posted on

Bugs, etm

So, I’ve been intermittently thinking of a place to use the above “new” abbreviation for a little bit now and I decided this was as good a way to do it as any. I stumbled across it a few weeks ago on social media (one of the few things it’s still good for is finding things that make me laugh) and my first thought was “well, this is probably not a real thing.” because,you know, internet. Followed quickly by “I don’t care, I love it and I’m going to incorporate it into something as often as I can.” which brings me back to this. According to the post; etm is a Latin abbreviation, similar to etc, et al, and the like. It is an abbreviation of et merda which, the internet tells me to believe, means “and shit” as, for example, etc which is the abbreviation of et cetera, translates to “and so forth” and now that I have expanded all of your vocabularies by a little bit I feel like I can move on. I’m nothing if not helpful, right?

To the title, well I’ve been slacking lately on my “WTF is that?!?!” posts. Mainly because the bug life I’ve encountered, while varied, and often new to me, has rarely been alarming. It took me a little longer than I expected to find this particular post due to it being almost four years ago, as well as me stopping to peruse a few old posts because, why not, but I wanted that post in particular because it was one that I knew featured an excellent example of “WTF IS THAT?!?!”

If you haven’t figured out yet that all of that is leading to this, well, I guess you’re new here. But, also, it’s leading to this because the other day I experienced a new and semi frightening example of WTFIT.

There were a couple reasons my foot is as close as it is to that bug… A.) I wanted something in the frame so you could more easily visualize the size of this behemoth bug. I assure you, that picture is not comparable to, say, a typical fishing trip photo. My foot is about four inches away from the bug. I swear to god that damn thing was at least the size of a golf ball. B.) It was dead.

At least I thought it was dead. As I debated where to kick the corpse, the bug’s legs started churning like a colonial era butter maker. I won’t say I’m afraid of bugs, but we have an understanding; stay out of my personal space and I’ll likely let you go about your ugly business. Mostly. In this particular case, I grabbed a brick and dropped it on the bug from a height of about two feet. This seemed to accomplish what I was going for here, namely killing the bug without leaving a huge buggy mess to clean up. I kicked the bug out into the street, about three kicks on what I guessed to be a par 4 down my driveway and put the brick back in the neighbor’s yard where it belonged. I took one last look at the bug and, much to my surprise, it was still moving, efforting desperately in an attempt to right itself. And probably to hunt down the SOB that dropped a brick on it for all I know. A short time later B2 got home from work, and as I watched her back into the driveway, I saw she rolled over the beast. Taking another status check on the monster I must admit I wasn’t totally surprised to see that, while it wasn’t moving, it also didn’t exactly look any worse for the experience. It wasn’t until about an hour later, when I took one last look, that I could tell some passing vehicle had sufficiently flattened it out of existence. Finally satisfied Bug-hemoth (get it? Behemoth/Bug-hemoth?) had gone to its final destination, I went back about my business.

As long as we’re on this topic, here’s another odd bug I don’t ever remember seeing before. Our carport gets a lot of use as an outdoor sitting area. Since I’ve lived there I’ve enjoyed sitting there, for no real reason other than it’s typically protected from the weather. The exception to that rule is in the warmer months of the year when the afternoon/early evening sun beats down mercilessly on our sitting area. When that happens, we move to a little patio just off the carport that is pretty well shaded.

Excuse the morning light/shadows, I’m never going to be confused with PhojoMamaTM as a photographer, but this should at least give you an idea of our little sanctuary. Sitting out there one afternoon, as B2 and I chatted about our day, I noticed what appeared to be a piece of lint on a leaf of one of the potted plants pictured above. When I realized it was moving purposefully across said leaf, I knew it wasn’t lint. I’m pretty perceptive that way apparently. A quick GTS led us to believe it was some kind of mealybug and again I’d like to point out to you that this is a direct violation of bugs staying away from my shit. They are supposedly harmless to people, but they’ve been consuming my plants like, well, me when confronted with a pastry cart filled with lovely baked goods. And I can’t have that. Either, really. The pastry cart and these fluffy little bastards are both on a parallel track with the destination leaving me shaking my head and muttering obscenities. I asked someone at the local nursery what I could do to rid my plants of these pests and she advised me the best way was to take a cotton ball and wipe the leaves down with rubbing alcohol. Look at the picture again. If you think I’ve got the patience to wipe each #@%**$# leaf with rubbing alcohol, well, you’ve apparently never met me before. That ain’t happening. So, instead, I chose what some may see as sadistic (I however refuse to accept sadism as remotely applicable where bugs are involved. Have you even seen Men In Black?) but I have found to be quite effective in removing these pests. A lighter. The extended version typically used to light candles, etc. The bugs are quickly and efficiently immolated with minimal scarring to the leaves of my plants.

Win/win for me. The bugs? Not so much.

I’ll put a bow on this one by noting Manchester Orchestra is bouncing between my ears today. Man I love that band. Whenever I mention MO, I always feel like I should give a hat tip to my friend Tom for pointing me in their direction. What a great call Tom, thanks again and always. I would certainly place them on the medal stand of my current favorites, along with Drive By Truckers and John Moreland. Additionally, all three bands have got new, or at least newish albums out and all three are stellar. I can’t recommend enough that you catch any of these acts should they be touring in your general area. Not sure if I wrote this bit up or not so I apologize if I’m being redundant, but B2 and I caught a John Moreland show this past spring in Saxapahaw and actually ran into him outside the venue chilling out before the show. We talked for maybe twenty minutes. Just an absolutely lovely human being to chat with. Also one of the best songwriters around.

Peace

Posted on

Back To Back, Baby!

That’s right, two days in a row! Don’t expect this to be a regular occurrence btw. But I figured, given yesterday’s post, the least I could do was to pop out an update of some sort.

Last night was a lot of fun for me and I feel comfortable saying it was for everyone involved too. A very supportive crowd of around 50 people, seven local performers/artists/me and I’ll sum it up briefly by saying there are some ridiculously talented people living in this area.

Right off the bat, first performer, Jack, sang three original tunes and accompanied himself on piano. Next up was a local writer, Barbara, who told the story of her car crash from a few years back. That brought up Marquez, again singing and playing the piano on an original piece as well as a cover of “Times They Are A Changin'”. Another writer, Luke, came up and read a bit of crime fiction that was so vivid and descriptive, man he nailed it. After that came two of my favorite people from out here, Luke and Rosemary. B2 works with Luke, so I’ve known him for a little bit and I knew he and Rosemary were musical. We have, from time to time watched their toddler so they could practice, or record, or mix, or whatever they needed to do for an EP they’ve got coming out soon. Anyway, GOOD GOD THEY KILLED IT! Beautiful voices, excellent harmonies, and outstanding picking on two original pieces. Man, I get chills just thinking about how good they were. This brought me to the microphone and, truly, I was pleased with the way it went. I got some laughs, a couple “Awww’s” and I think I even heard a gasp in there at one point. So, all things considered, I couldn’t have asked for a better reception. Rounding out the evening was Lalenja who sang songs from Tuck and Patti, Billie Holiday, and Bessie Smith all a cappella and each one outstanding.

One of the things Jeremy, the Artistic Director/Emcee/Talent Wrangler/prettymuchanythingelseneeded mentioned is that these pieces will be streamed. I looked up the radio station website and there was nothing there about streaming, so I’m not sure how or where it’ll happen, but once I find out the details for that, I’ll pass them on here.

In summary, last night was a total gas. As both an audience member and as a speaker. I really hope this type of thing can become a regular or at least semi-regular part of the community.

Final thing; trying to choose videos for yesterday’s post put me on a definite R.E.M. kick so I’ve had Automatic For The People echoing between my ears (at a reasonable decibel level) (kinda) whilst putting this together. Great album from an excellent band.

Peace

Posted on

Radio Sweetheart

This is not only a wonderful song by the equally wonderful Elvis Costello (as they used to say on XRT “if your Elvis is dead, try ours”) it’s also an appropriate title for today. I’ll be reading a couple brief excerpts from my scrawlings this evening in front of a small (50 or so people) group at a taping for a segment on one of the local country music stations.

That might sound like a bigger deal than it really is. I mean, I think it’s pretty cool I was asked and all, but the reality is they’re taping eight 15 minute segments and will air four. So, to me, the chances of my stuff getting any air time tilt toward remote. Not saying I’m not pleased with what I chose for this evening, I went back and forth countless times until I found the right combination of drama and humor while making sure it was “safe” for the radio. In my mind I accomplished that. It was no easy task either, going back through trying to find something with no profanity for instance. Or at least a small enough amount that I could edit it out and not lose context completely. I’m just saying I don’t know how realistic actually getting air time will be.

You may be asking “Geez, how did this come to be? You getting your stuff on the radio? Why you of all people? Have they never read any of your writing?” These are all valid, if possibly harsh, questions. Allow me to give you some background.

A couple months ago I got a text from B2 asking if I would be interested in sharing some of my writing on a radio show taping June 8th. You might say I was intrigued. Go ahead, say it, I was intrigued. So the deal is this. The local theatrical production company is aiming at putting on a regular or semi-regular radio drama. They needed to find a way to work out any kinks in the system prior to attempting that type of undertaking and thought a Prairie Home Companion esque radio show might accomplish that goal. The first taping was last month at the local microbrewery and B2 and I went to see what it was all about. Let me tell you, it was all about a lot of fun. Local musicians, storytellers, and authors got 15 minutes each to do their thing in front of an audience. After the show, the audio was taken back to the studio for editing, cutting the performances into radio friendly time bits. The show that was taped last month airs this month, every Monday at 6:15 PM local time. Of course I forgot to tune in to the first segment to check that out, but that’s what I mean when I say my bits might not even see the airwaves. As far as the artists taped tonight, they’ll air next month.

I’ll keep you all in the loop if and when it airs, although tbh, I’m not even sure if the station has any kind of streaming ability. I’d like to make a crack about how they play both kinds of music (s/o to Jake and Elwood) but I have never tuned in to them, so I should probably keep the snark to a minimum. Kinder, gentler me in action right there.

I knew I wanted to throw in a link to a video related to radio, I never stopped to think how many there were to choose from. Holy crap. REM has a couple, including the aptly named Radio Song but I liked the Costello title better. Side note; damn, REM had some great music videos. Second side note; damn, I wish I had seen them live at some point. Maybe just prior to the height of their powers, while they were still playing smaller venues. Must have been pretty wild. I thought about The Buggles happy little pop hit, made famous by MTV or Queen’s song Radio Gaga but again, probably a misleading title. I’m not actively looking for any more radio-related videos/songs, but if anyone would like to fire off a suggestion for the followup post when and if my stuff airs, well feel free to launch them at me.

Lastly, in addition to the aforementioned videos bouncing between my ears, I’ve also been listening to a playlist I put together a while ago and add to on occasion, called Speeding Ticket. Various songs from Nirvana, Tom Petty, blink-182, The Clash, DBT, among others over the last 40 minutes or so, and it’s been thoroughly delightful. I think I’m going to pack this up now though. I’ve got to go bring out my stuff for tonight (yup, going old school) and read through it a handful of times in an attempt at not looking like a boob tonight. Fingers crossed…

Peace